A man should look as if he has bought his clothes with intelligence, put them on with care—and then forgotten all about them. Such gems of sartorial wisdom are the hallmark of legendary British clothier Sir Hardy Amies’ 1965 classic ABC of Men’s Fashion—regrettably long out of print. Until now, that is. It’s just been re-issued thanks to a major new fashion exhibition at London’s Victoria & Albert Museum, and men everywhere can benefit from such a stylish lexicon.

Every facet of the well-dressed fellow’s wardrobe is represented, together with a few acid remarks (see Fat Men and Short Men). Hell, Sir Hardy earned a bit of stuffiness; the dashing designer was a British secret agent before setting up shop at 14 Savile Row in 1946, and he went on to design costumes for both Stanley Kubrick and the Queen of England.

—J.P.S.

Bag Men: Seems the yabbos over in England are wrapping themselves up in the the latest in visual intimidation—the Goggle Jacket. Apparently an evolution on some very idiosyncratic athletic gear, the British press—charming monster that it is—has cast the face-hiding anorak as a impending public threat (despite no evidence of its criminal use.)

In the same vein, the the London Times has added another level of terror for a English public already weary of Islamic signifiers by labeling the whole plastic mess the “Burqa for boys.” “The trouble in society,” says one quoted expert, “is not just crime but the fear of crime, and this new jacket is enough to give anyone a shiver down their spine.” Indeed, camo prints have always sent us running for the hills and we never really got over our childhood fear of C.O.B.R.A.

President Bartlett: Claiborne’s men’s line has a new designer. [CNN Money]

Plastic Fantastic: For the cost of a decent steak, Britons can pick up a full polyester suit. We’ll have the steak, thanks. [Metro UK]

Bogey: With a skull on his belt, Rory Sabbatini joins the rare club headed by Greg Norman. [Magnificent Bastard]

Color Theory: A rainbow of Vans for Spring. [Kitsune Noir]

Cold Feet: Boots to keep your toes from freezing. [The Moment]

Class War: Wealthy guys who date celebrities. [Ledger Pop Journal]

It’s The Perfect Time For… April77’s Spring/Summer collection. [Hypebeast]

Dress to Suppress: Amidst what appears to be a total collapse of democracy, journalistic independence and human rights, some intrepid fashion writer actually managed to file this story on style and the derailed Zimbabwean presidential campaign. Who needs freedom of the press anyway? [All Africa]

Bulletproof Bonnet: Perhaps a more useful mode of dress for scared Zimbabweans, this cutting-edge, street-thug tech hoodie can stop a 9mm round. [BBC]

Ships Ahoy: A naval salute to Chambray. [A Continuous Lean]

Get Fit: A little primer on silhouette theory. [Permanent Style]

Go Green:Take a peek at Timo Weiland’s bio-friendly billfolds. [Refinery29]

Off The Cuff: Pop quiz, hotshot. Your brand-new slacks haven’t been to the tailor yet and you’ve got 15 minutes to meet your people at the bar. What do you do? What do you do? [Esquire]

Monica Feudi via IHT

It’s fairly common for a writer to stretch a thin idea farther than they should. Generally, the worst that happens is a puffier-than-usual puff piece. But when a designer does it…things can get ugly.

See just how ugly»

Precious Metals: Bask in the gleam of these new Kris Van Assche kicks. [High Snobiety]

Falling Hard: Racked cops to renewing their Middle-School crush. [ Racked]

Seoul Patrol: Hint has words with Korean futurist J. Juun. [Hint]

Precision Cuts: The Moment’s Hitler hairdo is making us feel ill. [The Moment]

International Rag Trade: Given the current exchange rate, vintage may be your best bet when shopping in London. [Time Out]

What a Difference a Year Makes: PSFK does some side-by-side comparison of Vice’s annual trend report. [PSFK]

This week’s Monocle features a story on a London store called Albam that has made its name by promoting local production—meaning within the UK, or failing that, within western Europe—in favor of the higher profit margins but questionable labor conditions of East Asian factories. It’s a common enough tale, but we couldn’t resist a little peek at how things work across the pond.

More on Monocle’s local crusade»

With social conscience becoming an increasingly valued part of a brand, it was only a matter of time before charities decided to get in on the action. That way, they can finally make some real scratch.

UK Vogue is reporting Oxfam’s first designer boutique in London’s Westbourne Grove. An all-star team of British designers contributed to the store, which combines donated designer clothes with unique and reworked pieces from the London College of Fashion. Of course, it’s all sustainable and fair traded to within an inch of its life. After all, they’re still about fighting poverty»

Driving a Benz: We first fell for Julie Benz of Dexter and Rambo back when we saw her on the pilot episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Wait, did we just say that out loud? [Maxim]

Back to Church: A historical shoemaker reopens is classic store in London. [We Are The Market]

Moisturize!: Just in time for sunburn season, 37 ways to preserve your ugly mug. [Men’s Health]

Under the Influence: Picks from your favorite online influencers. [Hypebeast]

So Money: Grab Illustrated Example’s white-leather wallet. [Word is Bomb]

Ladies Love Cool James: LL Cool J flexes that mic on his arm and unleashes clothes for B-boys, shorties and ‘round tha way girls. [DNRNews]

It looks like we were a little premature when we scoffed at Monocle’s sentimental weakness for their local newsstand.

In fact, they’re getting into the business themselves. They’ve bought up a 20-year-old stand on Charlotte Street in London and are taking things over. It will be the flagship store in what the culture mag calls “a network of branded news outlets around the globe.”

It’s a pretty bold statement about the resurgence of print, vertical integration, and the necessity of community interaction in an increasingly dislocated world. Either that or they just wanted better placement in the displays.

While some claim Sotheby’s’ upcoming Damien Hirst blowout—which is expected to bring in about $120 million—is merely an excuse to clear out a backlog of unsold work from Hirst’s London gallery, the bad boy Brit artist insists it actually marks a major turning point in his colorful career.

Titled Beautiful Inside My Head Forever and timed to coincide with the 20th anniversary of the celebrated Freeze exhibition which launched his career, Hirst says the sale represents the last of his long-running series of formaldehyde works, spin, and spot paintings, which have become a bit too predictable.

“It’s like my friend [late Clash frontman] Joe Strummer once told me about writing songs,” Hirst says. “If you can guess what the rhyme’s gonna be in the next line, then it’s shit and you’ve gotta change it.” We couldn’t agree more; Hirst’s work, turned out by his “factory,” Warhol-style, resembles nothing more then a broken, though very profitable, record at this point. Time for a new gimmick, old boy.

The pea coat has been the formal overcoat of choice for quite some time now. It might be time to give the trench coat another try. Of course, it helps if it’s in black wool instead of Bogart’s usual canvas-colored gabardine.

This one comes from our old Brit friends at b store with a stripped down look, a slim silhouette, and a comfortably bathrobe-like belt. East Coasters might want to sit on it until spring, but it should be a welcome addition by then.

And knowing London, we bet it does pretty well against the rain.

Magazines may be hitting a few speed bumps in the U.S., but it looks like Brit mags are still having a jolly old time. They’re not just staying in print; they’re getting into brick-and-mortar.

Last time we checked in with Monocle, they were collaborating with Drakes for a set of British-made scarves for their online store, but it looks like they weren’t satisfied with staying online. PSFK informs us they’re branching out into a spot off London’s Marylebone High Street. They’ll have less than 100 sq ft to work with, but they’ll manage to fit in all their collaborations, including a fragrance with Comme des Garcons and a travel gear from Porter, along with some of the editors’ favorite swag.

Velvet slippers have been venturing farther and farther outdoors lately. We’ve seen them come from sneaker companies and on the heels of a MOTH, but it’s always best to go to the source. And in this case, the source is England.

Shipton & Heneage’s only retail stores are across the sea (Paris and London, to be specific), but you can get these bespoke slippers well enough through the mail…even if that means you have to get measured stateside. They’ll even throw in the extra-British touch of sewing your family seal over the toes. (Judging by the two-headed eagle, this gentleman’s a Habsburg.)

How to wear a velvet slipper»

There have been a lot of different representations of Kate Moss over the years—most of the photographic, non-clothed kind—but this is one of the more ambitious ones.

Found at the Arts Gallery in London, it’s part of a larger series of portraits of gossip mag staples, done by painter Yuko Nasu without any knowledge of who the faces are. We can’t say much for the likeness, but we think they captured Ms. Moss’s essence pretty well.

Especially the swirling around the eyes…

Where Americans have the Polar Bear Plunge, Britons have the Tweed Run, which saw hundreds of fully-tweeded patriots taking to Savile Row last Saturday on fixed gear bicycles. (We assume their Penny-Farthings were in the shop.)

The tie is a pretty monolithic item as menswear choices go, so it’s nice to have a few more oddball choices on-hand, in case you feel an unconventional streak coming on.

Drake’s is generally a pretty staid British brand, but summer comes to London too, so they’ve got a few repp stripes handy just in case. And, if you find yourself near Portland, you won’t even have to cross an ocean to get one.

The season for white canvas shoes is almost upon us, and luckily F-Troupe is fully prepared.

Of course, you’ll have to manage bringing it over from Paris (and navigating the European shoe sizing chart), but the flash of color in the laces and soles should make it worth your while. There are also blue, green, and purple versions, but we’re going with the one that matches our Thriller jacket.

Modern watches have piled on a lot of functions, but there hasn’t much in the way of philosophical ponderings…until now.

This watch from the British marque Mr. Jones adds a daily planner in place of the usual numbers, giving you a sense of how long you have for each activity. Of course, there are no guarantees it’ll fit your own personal schedule—the chap in question makes it into bed before midnight each night and clocks three solid hours of daily television—but it should give you some idea of how to map out your day.

And exactly how much time you have for lunch.

Charity has its rewards. Especially in London, it turns out.

At a hospital benefit, Kate Moss raised 5000 UKP by auctioning off a single kiss. Of course, the true value of Mme. Moss’s momentary affection is priceless, but in the interest of a well-funded health system, it’s worth knowing what the price tag came to. It should be enough to buy an extra defibrillator or two…

We can only imagine what the tab would have been in more flush times.

This pattern’s popping up more and more these days, usually in canvas. But we’re always willing to try something new…

In this case it’s a Killspencer-ish ripstop fabric, courtesy of the British marque French Connection (via World’s Best Ever). A threaded check pattern softens the shine, but it’s still a bit of a dicey proposition. You can count on canvas for a simple, earthy feeling, but goretex will either come off as futuristic or just plain oily.

For just over $50 a pop though, you can probably afford to find out.

It’s amazing what a bit of whimsy can do…

Paul Smith will unveil this public garbage bin at the London Design Museum next week, and it would appear his animal fixation is entirely intact.

It’s not all leporine whimsy, though; there’s some real function here too. As designed, the rabbit ears will light up every time someone tosses something in, which is as effective a litter deterrent as we can think of.

But anyone passing through the park at night without a full knowledge of the latest design developments will be in for quite a shock.

Internet radios like this one have been a favorite with the CES crowd for some time, but they haven’t quite had the content to break through to the mainstream. A box lets you stream audio feeds through something a bit more lush than computer speakers, but so far, most of the feeds come from FM stations, which isn’t quite tempting enough to make us toss out our antennas.

But it’s coming along. Amazing Radio (via PSFK) just launched in the UK with a roster of all unsigned artists. The artists get the lion’s share of the mp3 sales, but mostly they get some much-needed exposure and a chance to get their songs on the airwaves…or audio streams, as the case may be.

Of course, the jury’s still out on their choice in bands…but at least they won’t have to worry about keeping their signal clear.

Another of London’s perks: DIY street art for the masses. This home Banksy kit retails for ten quid at a shop called iartistlondon (via [PSFK) where you can get a similar guide to making your own Hirst-style diamond-encrysted skull. Well, crystal-bead encrusted anyway.

Such is Mango: Scarlett Johansson overwhelms our style judgment. [Refinery29]

Looks Like Victory: The MB tracks down Col. Kilgore’s sunglasses. [Magnificent Bastard]

Well Pressed: A trip to trad central, a.k.a. J. Press. [Ivy Style]

Probably Werewolves: London falls prey to squatters. [Luxist]

Hard times in London may have brought back the criminal world’s most dapper pastime: the jewel heist. Last week, a pair of well-tailored gentlemen relieved a Bond St shop of more than $65 million in jewelry before escaping in a blue BMW, which was subsequently traded for a silver Mercedes. And that’s only the most recent in a string of thefts that’s plagued London’s jewelry district for months, which suggests the days of the gentleman jewel thief may be returning.

Of course, we at Kempt do not endorse criminal pursuits. But as criminal pursuits go, we definitely prefer the ones that involve luxury cars, daring getaways and expensive suits. If we ever have to resort to extralegal activity, we hope we’ll do it with this much panache.

London may be seeing more snow than rain these days, but it’s still nice to have a brolly on hand.

This one from London Undercover (hat tip) caught our eye for its bright black-and-white houndstooth—a trad move, despite what Alexander McQueen would have you believe. It doesn’t pack quite the aristocratic punch of the more expensive models, but for 50 pounds ($80), we doubt you’ll do much better.