Guy Talk: Designers sound off on the possibility of a New York menswear-only fashion week. [Men.Style]

Radar Love: Is publisher Maer Roshan patronizing John Varvatos, or is Varvatos patronizing Roshan? [Gawker]

Off Off-Price: Ralph Lauren pulls clothes from discount retailers. [Trading Markets]

Hint Homme: Catching up with Hedi Slimane. [Mode et Utopie]

Cheap Wednesday: Dealfeed refers us to skinny denim discounts. [Racked]

Hardy Outlook: Brit line Hardy Amies ups its retail profile. [DNRNews]

Service with a Smile: Gridskipper reviews the rudest hip retailers in the city. We can’t really relate as we get good treatment everywhere we go—no, seriously. [Gridskipper]

Michael Caine is one of the most stylish men in cinema, so it figures that he has good taste in music. The English actor, who’s won two Oscars and was knighted by the Queen in 2000, recently issued a saccharine compilation CD in the UK of his favorite mellow tunes, called Cained; the disc, which contains everything from Nina Simone to Doctor Rockit, is now available on Amazon as an import.

Apparently the project came about after Caine mentioned to his fellow Commander of the British Empire Sir Elton John that he frequently makes mixed tapes for friends like Sir Sean Connery, Sir Roger Moore and Baron Lloyd-Weber. With the penchant the design cabal has for seizing on anything this coolly quirky, you can count on Cained providing the soundtrack to more than one event during that men’s fashion week everyone’s babbling about.

Pitti Uomo 2008 Adam Kimmel dinner

So for those of you who aren’t caught up in the seemingly endless world tour of fashion weeks and marketing conferences (and who is), the past week’s Pitti Uomo—a mostly menswear exhibition in Florence-represents what is perhaps some of them best in male dress.

Alas, we have too many sartorial obligations on the homefront, so instead of enjoying our breathless coverage from the cobblestone streets of Firenze, you’ll have to make due with this list of links and wrap ups »

Suspending Judgment: A dissenting opinion on the current popularity of braces forwarded through exemplars like Urkel. [Casanova Peasant]

A Waist of Money: Speaking of keeping your pants aloft, this belt will set you back a cool $18,000. [NYMag]

Classic Cut: 501 jeans, the collector’s edition. [Retro To Go]

Imitation of Life: If you thought Zac Posen was already a little Stepford creepy… [Fashion Visa]

Cut Corners: Small-time hood Wesley Snipes breaks some lesser laws. [Manolo for the Men]

Image Maker: Valentino’s new men’s line will take direct inspiration from the house’s founder. Shocker. [DNRNews]

Cutting Edge: At Hong Kong Fashion week the models are fully trained in the ancient arts of self defense. [Monsters and Critics]

Buyers Beware: It doesn’t matter if you’re a buyer for Bergdorf Goodman with millions of dollars of purchasing power, the ability to save or destroy fashion labels and a lifetime in the industry—if Beyonce needs to sit, they’re making you stand. [The Observer]

A Match Made in Heaven: Rumors are swirling that the bombastic, unpredictable fashion diva Naomi Campbell and bombastic, unpredictable semi-fascist dictator Hugo Chavez are now are getting all Nic and Carla. Lovers of democracy beware. [Fashion Mag Daily]

Hot off of Pitto Uomo, the fashion cognoscenti hustled over the Apennines, landing in Italy’s fashion capitol, Milan. As always, there’s far too much to report on, even from our remote Manhattan perch.

Nonetheless, enjoy these links and highlights after the jump »

Tall Story: Kimora Lee Simmons is as much a “corrections officer” as she is a “designer”. [The Newspaper]

Oui, Oui: Reports from Paris fashion week. [DNRNews]

Window Dressing: In Amsterdam, storefront prostitutes are being replaced by mannequins and some are noticing the difference. [London Times]

Dita Von Teese Wonderbra: Is all you need to know. [Vogue UK]

Fleet Afoot: One shoe in seven minutes. [A Suitable Wardrobe]

Almost There: Coming Soon is coming, soon. [Material Interest]

In an interesting development, yesterday’s Thom Browne show eschewed the usual “military” and “post-apocalyptic rock star” themes so popular these days in favor of a carnival vibe, complete with a feathery ringmaster to introduce the show.

(This Refinery 29 post offers a good overview of the madness, and it’s from a familiar face.)

In short, Fashion Week just got a little bit more Cirque du Soleil.

Photographed by our fearless lensman, Patrick McMullan.

So far Fashion Week has been pretty much of a disappointment sartorially; blame it on the morons who decided to hold the thing in the middle of February, when inclement weather dictates that one must choose comfort over style, like it or not. Still, we’ve seen a couple of standouts at the various shows and parties; first up, natty Nigel Barker, the London-born photographer and America’s Next Top Model judge, pictured here at the Betsey Johnson show with fashion maven Mary Alice Stephenson.

More on today’s MOTH »

Photographed by our fearless lensman, Patrick McMullan.

One thing we always look forward to during Fashion Week is the daily appearance of Hamish Bowles, Vogue’s European editor-at-large — not to mention an impeccably-plumed peacock who was one of our original MOTHs.

More on today’s MOTH»

With blisters on our feet and a thousand-yard stare in our eyes, we have returned from the trenches of New York Fashion Week with a mix of expected news and intriguing surprises. Kicking away the dull, the fey and the Sean Jean, we’ve complied a week-long mini countdown of the top ten collections for the Kempt man (hint: that’s you).

10. Tim Hamilton:

We’d never want to give you the impression that Tim Hamilton is anything less than the genuine article—a young talent with a true, original voice. That said, the Kempt man had best tread lightly through this collection of organza shorts, Autobahn-inspired jumpers and suits with sweatpant ankles. There’s a lot to pick and choose here, but much of it is best viewed on others. It’s inspiring stuff, but a risk to buy. [Men.Style]

And #9 is…»

Robert Geller

We return to our runway recaps, detailing the top ten Kempt looks from Fashion Week. It’s important to note here that since most men’s collections are revealed to marketers and buyers two weeks before the big festivities under the tents, most designers have a two-week jump on the women’s clothiers, allowing for laid-back, open-bar presentations here and there. This may or may not have been a good thing. We’ll have to check with our sponsor.

8. Loden Dager:

A little-known brand in the big scheme of things, Loden Dager has gained a good deal of popular support from editors and insiders. Some of this is due to it’s colorful cast of designers, but more of it has to do with their intriguing mix of prep and subversion. Yes, yes, at their presentation (white wine) there were flat-front pants and simple overcoats a plenty. But the careful use of oversized checks, wide collars and bold color palettes made these familiar, almost conservative forms new and inviting. In particular, a ghostly slate three-piece suit was a winner. [Paper Magazine]

And #7 is…»

Photographed by our fearless lensman, Patrick McMullan.

Fiat heir and Agnelli scion Lapo Elkann has experienced a lot of ups and downs in his 30 years. Once destined to succeed his legendary grandfather Gianni Agnelli, Lapo’s career trajectory came to a crashing halt when he overdosed in the apartment of a transsexual hooker in Turin in 2005. He has since sobered up (according to some reports) and moved to New York after the lukewarm launch of a sunglasses line called Italia Independent.

Through it all, he has remained impeccably dressed»

Continuing with our top-ten New York Fashion Week countdown, we’ve got to tip you in on who we left out. Adam Kimmel was at Pitto Uomo, like so many of the best New York designers. For Kimmel, though, the tradeshow became a personal graduation party, so this year he looses his city privileges this season. Ralph transcends lists, Obedient Sons (love ‘em as we do) took a turn for the slouchy, and Mr. Thom Browne, well, he’s in a class by himself. On with the list…

6. DKNY:

You were still playing Contra when Donna Karen was a growing concern. Retired and now renewed, Karen is still a considerable name and her DKNY (see above) remains a good source for office-proof, stylish essentials. The black cardigan, slate blazer and raincoat are subtly sly and everything else manages to stay within the lines of trend and classic elegance without attracting too much attention. For those of you who tread lightly and carry big sticks. [Men.Style]

And #5 is…»

Vegan Pancakes: The divine Ms. Portman begins her conquest of the vegan footwear industry. [Racked]

Magnum Opus: Vivienne Westwood’s Opus makes it to stores, clocking in at 200 pages, 90 photographs, and $2700. [TimesOnline]

Take You Higher: The fashion world’s ankles just got a little colder. [Brandish]

The Flow: A flowchart to answer all your sartorial conundrums. Or more specifically, to keep you away from striped shirts. [Arabian Monkey]

Rounders: Refinery29’s Fashion Week roundup. Highlights include flannel, leather pants and gold. It’s going to be a long spring. [Refinery29]

As we head towards the top (or bottom) of our list, sportswear slowly falls away and the cream rises.

4. Tie — Gilded Age and John Varvatos:

Two more different collections would be hard to find. For the Kempt man, however, Gilded Age and John Varvatos represent a perfect balance of casual and formal. Yes, Gilded Age (pictured) upped the ante this year with a new capsule line of fine, history-inspired wool suits and bowler hats. Still, the best things here stressed comfort and ease—hearty outdoor ware for more active hours. Varvatos, on the other hand, has pushed himself closer to European territory. His shimmering gray collection lies closer to the boundaries of fashion than almost any of his previous work (perhaps toiling for Converse has compelled him to whip up these chancy new lapels and such.) It’s heady stuff, but just as slick and masculine as ever. Grab a little from each of these lines, and you’re set till 2010. [links above]

And #3 is…»

The Beard Next Door: The Christian Right has been searching for a “cure” for homosexuality for decades. Hayden Christensen discovered Rachel Bilson in a fraction of that time. [Gawker]

Candy Ass: The Naked Cowboy doing well in his suit against chocolatier, still regrettably underclothed. [NyMag]

What Chu Talkin’ Bout?: Still button-cute, Gary Coleman proves there’s a 22-year-old girl redhead out there for everyone. Aww. [NYPost]

Hallelujah: Christian sex toys—well fancy that. [NPR]

Throwing Gas: Roger Clemens embarrasses himself before Congress, then testifies. [Magnificent Bastard]

“Fly My Pretties! Fly!”: Channeling The Wizard of Oz, Gareth Pugh sics flying monkeys on London. [FemaleFirst UK]

Tid Bites: Forget the sublime notebooks and cheeky mittens—Kate and Jack Spade’s best debut during Fashion Week was the Smurf-sized breakfast. [Hamish Robertson]

Those sweaters aren’t going to tailor themselves.

To that end, Uniqlo has enlisted Tim Hamilton to stitch up a microcollection, on the heels of Loden Dager’s work for them earlier this year. Hamilton got a CFDA nod last year and made a strong showing at this year’s fashion week, which we’re sure has something to do with his recent success.

More pics after the jump»

Kate Moss by Irving Penn

Going, Going…: Christie’s will auction off a 135-piece collection of glamour photography by Richard Avedon, Diane Arbus and Man Ray which will include tastefully nude shots of Gisele and Ms. Moss. The Irving Penn cheesecake pics will likely go for $30,000 or so?about the same price as a night with Kristen. [Vogue UK]

Advocacy Journalism: A popular men’s fashion magazine contributes to a major shift in American foreign affairs. No, it isn’t The Economist. [Jezebel]

Cat’s Out of the Bag: Paul Smith is having a sample sale, just try to keep it on the down lo… crap… never mind. [Racked]

Four Eyes: Pull out your prescription lenses because cute/wacked nerd-chaser Verena Von Pfetten admits, “I just love me some myopia.” [Huffington Post]

Man’s Man: Jason Preston is everything women could want - fashionable, attractive, connected and willing to throw down to defend a lady’s honor. Too bad for them he’s engaged to Marc Jacobs. [NYPost]

All Aboard: By the next decade, New York Fashion Week may have a new home on top of the West Side Rail Yards, forcing poor Conde Nasters to walk more than half a block to the tents. [NY Daily News]

No Accounting for Taste: Dolce & Gabbana may be the most famous Italians slammed for tax evasion since Al Capone. [DNRNews]

Stepping Light: Rough day? Sit back and enjoy Common Projects’ relaxing spring collection. [Common Projects]

Mr. Mom: First, she was a woman. Then, he was a man. Now, he’s pregnant and we’re dizzy. [HuffPo]

Tom Boy?: In related news, Tom Ford also plans to poop out a kid. [NYMag]

Trend Setters:Working hard to keep up to date on urbane tomboys, alternadads and all those other mythical creatures of lifestyle lore? A short peek at Radar will keep you ahead of the curve. [Radar Online]

Three Pointer: After years of sitting on the bench, Michael Jordan finally shows some game by employing Tex Winter’s famous “Triangle Offense” in Miami. [NYPost]

Chic Picks: Free music from everyone’s favorite fashion oracles. [Refinery29]

Who Wears Short Shorts?: Styledash don’t want to see none of your inner thighs. [Styledash]

Go Greyhound: Like every other used and abused streetwalker who’s seen too many hard New York nights, Fashion Week may be shuffling over to the Port Authority. [NYMag]

Go Back to Jersey: What’s wrong with Joey Pants? Try everything. [Magnificent Bastard]

Bathing Beauty: Get out your water wings and take a dive with Olympic swimmer Natalie Coughlin. [Men’s Vogue]

Rock-A-Fellas: It’s shaping up to be a banner week for ex-label mates and eternal hustlers Damon Dash and Jay-Z. [NME]

On The Trail: Will this campaign season ever end? [Guardian UK]

Ol’ Blighty: Meanwhile the sceptred isle has its own sartorial issues. [Daily Mail UK]

Style Points: This seasonal scorecard of surviving menswear designers is probably the best digest of critiques we’ve seen all year… except our own, of course. [NYTimes]

Shock Teese: Our favorite burlesque star, Frau Dita Von Teese, once - surprise, surprise - filmed some kinky girl-on-girl porn, some of it hot, some of (particularly the bit with the shoes) not so much. Not to worry, we still file her under “classy broad.” [Fleshbot, soooo NSFW]

Budget Kawakubo: H+M will borrow the outré edge of Comme des Garçons for a limited line this November. [Vogue UK]

Spelunking: Share your mancave with the world. [CNN iReport]

Guy Liner: Pete Wentz creates a make-up line for men, you know, because buying women’s make up is kinda gay. [Styledash]

Deal Alert: Get your Hicky’s. [Racked]

Il Bue Che Dice Cornuto All’asino: Italy bans Tom Ford ad because of their long tradition of high-minded, unporny public discourse. [Radar]

The Distinguished Gentleman From Milan: In related news, Santo Versace, business manager of the family label, has joined Italy’s Parliment. [WWD, 2nd item]

“Masturbation Cuts Cancer Risk”: Well, in that case, maybe we’ll try it some time. [BBC]

Slip Ons: Socks for men without shoes. [Men’s Vogue]

Ripped From the Headlines: Our very own Jared Paul Stern is set to be detonated in effigy in an upcoming episode of “Law & Order.” We couldn’t be more proud. Also, Chung-chung. [NY Daily News]

Ring of Fire: Like a ribbon ‘round your finger, this accessory will remind you of appointments or anniversaries or burn you in the process. [Uncrate]

Beggars and Choosers: A probing piece about the difficulties of funding and presenting at Fashion Week. [Papierdoll]

Monroe Doctrine: The Marilyn sex-tape fantasy goes “pop” in 1,460 words. [Defamer]

Members Only: A jacket checklist for these windbreaker months. [Refinery29]

The exclusivity arms race in New York nightlife has been getting a little ridiculous lately, so when we saw this, we knew it was either the beginning of the end times or an exceptionally clever PR hoax. Having pondered it, we’re ready to say it’s the latter.

(Fair Warning: we’re about to get very local.)

El Baño has made waves masquerading as an exclusive New York club, but they’ve been very cagy about their location even as they’ve publicized their existence. We’ve seen people pull off the secret club before, and this isn’t how it’s done. They don’t list opening dates, they don’t post menus, and they certainly don’t have drink lists as thin as the one El Baño is sporting. The shelf life of this sort of stunt isn’t going to last more than a few weeks, so we imagine they’re going for something a little more immediate. And if you think their opening date during fashion week is a coincidence, we’ve got a bridge to sell you.

We reveal the horrible truth»