Apparently The Moment has bondage on the brain.

After the recent round of Milan shows, the style blog of the internet’s favorite punching bag decided to declare a microtrend of shoes with rubber straps around them, “as if that’s all that may be holding the two pieces together.” That’s all very well and good, but why, may we ask, does this qualify as bondage-inspired? Do these Louis Vuitton wingtips remind anyone else of quality time in a dungeon with Helga? Pilates-inspired might be a little closer.

We’d guess Mr. Pask is thinking about something other than shoes.

Apparently the British line A Conference of Birds caught more eyes than just our own.

The line is soon to land at Confederacy, a West Coast store owned by 70s Show vet Danny Masterson. Apparently the DJ/restaurateur is expanding into the fashion scene, with surprisingly good taste in labels.

The store isn’t open just yet—it’s opening doors in August—but it should finish up by the time Confederacy of Birds unleashes their fall line.

There may have been more life in the necktie than we thought.

A Continuous Lean weighs in on the Death of the Tie with a WSJ editorial from professional tie man Alexander Olch. Apparently Olch isn’t worried. He points to rising tie-wearing among the youth, and blames overseas production for the slump in U.S. manufacturing.

Fair enough, but we bet he was open-collared when he wrote that.

Time to brush up on your jai alai skills.

This month’s Esquire features a rundown on the more obscure sports and the Brit-inspired clothes they require. This being Esquire, the labels range from Burberry to Canali to the omni-present Mr. Lauren, but the styles are much more…uniform. White pants, white knits and white sneakers are more or less the uniform from tennis to cricket. Polo isn’t mentioned, but you can probably guess what to wear»

We don’t like picking on fellow legitimate journalists—especially when they don’t work for the Times—but if you’ve walked past a newsstand in New York in the past few days, you might have seen this cover about the secret lives of married men. Or, more accurately, THE SECRET LIVES OF MARRIED MEN!!!

The article is already suffering the wrath of the internet in its online comments section, but we’d like to take a moment to consider the broader social ramifications of running such a cover story in these troubled times»

Did you notice anything odd about the Times Style Section today? We don’t mean chicken-fashion odd - indeed, we mean good odd. Look, when The Grey Lady offers up another David Coleman piece about the resurgence of pants, a “Modern Love” entry on dead babies/girlfriends/husbands or whatever dust bunnies are rattling around Cathy Horyn’s head, we’re always the first ones to take the piss.

But today…

It turns out we were a little overzealous welcoming Ryan McGinley to the Varvatos fold. McGinley’s still onboard for the Get Chucked campaign, but Varvatos favorite Danny Clinch isn’t going anywhere.

If we missed Clinch in the Varvatos tent, it’s probably because he was busy shooting these spots with Cheap Trick for the John Varvatos Collection, which hit newsstands in a few weeks. And if we may say so, the loose cap/tux combination has never looked so dashing.

Sorry, Danny and John. We want you to want us.

More McGinley and Clinch shots »

There are a lot of pages to be filled out there, and only so many ways to make a runway show sound interesting in print. And when their notebooks run dry and writers decide to put that education to use, things get…interesting.

This time, the culprit is the New York Times, who spiced up an article on a Prada show with a Margaret Atwood reference, quaint use of the phrase “men’s wear” and ominous references to social engineering. Most of the offenses are in aid of Village Voice alum Guy Trebay’s extended meditation on Miuccia Prada’s “complex sexual issues.” This being the fashion industry, we imagine she’s in good company. And no, for the record, we had not thought about the deeper social implications of flyless pants.

Our favorite moment in the article »

Just as designers and the likes of GQ try to convince men to get back into three-piece suits this season, the trend-happy New York Times Styles section is taking the contrarian route, advising readers to forego the whole hog and simply sport the vest.

In the process, however, they unfairly blame the demise of the three-piece suit back in the day on the wristwatch »

Note to GQ readers: think twice before following the advice on three-piece suits in the January issue too closely. While we’re all for the return of vested interests, proper tailoring is absolutely essential when it comes to adding the extra element. You do not want your shirt and tie peeking out between the vest and trousers, and nor should your waistband be on public view, as has happened to GQ’s unfortunate model pictured here. Without a smooth, uninterrupted vest-to-trouser transition, “the entire elegance of a three-piece suit is destroyed,” as the great Alan Flusser notes. For this reason, low-slung pants, as on display in GQ, do not work on a three-piece, and belt loops have no place here either; side tabs are preferable, and braces are of course the classic choice.

This isn’t to say the January GQ is a total loss »